Secondary Infertility is often a misunderstood, if not bewildering, concept. Plainly put, secondary infertility is the inability to conceive or carry to term after naturally conceiving and delivering one or more children. If you connect the dots, you can see that secondary infertility is indeed on the rise; as women wait longer to have children, advanced age plays a larger role in overall fertility and ability to conceive. Other causes of primary infertility can be behind secondary infertility, as well. These include, but aren’t limited to, advanced age, ovulatory disorders, early menopause, lifestyle choices and even low sperm count or poor quality eggs and/or sperm.
Secondary infertility can be an especially emotional, stressful issue. Not understanding “why it was so easy with the first” or not wanting to seem greedy when others struggle to get pregnant once…these are all very real, very valid feelings. Issues that infertile couples work through (How to pay for treatment? How will medication make me feel? How will I make it to all of these doctor appointments with the infertility specialist?) all have the added layer of parenting mixed in. Family and friends might just assume that you “only want one” or that it’s not so bad having trouble conceiving…after all, “you’ve got one, right?”
Couples may also feel as if they are straddling two different worlds: the “infertility” world and the “child” world– filled with birthday parties and sporting events. Fortunately, secondary infertility can often be successfully diagnosed and treated, in the same manner as primary infertility. Simple tests can uncover problems with hormones, sperm counts, and other anatomical issues.
Family issues might need to be explored that were once never previously discussed: adoption, donor eggs and/or sperm and even surrogacy. While heavy in nature, these discussions can lead to a stronger relationship and communication about the true parenting and family goals.
The bottom line is this: it’s important to listen to your gut instinct and take charge of your reproductive health. Speak up, and see a doctor. Take care of yourself, and even take time to verbalize your stress, anxiety or sadness to family and friends. They will be more likely to offer support and empathy if they understand what is going on! Our physicians (Drs. Celeste Brabec and Ryan Riggs) and caring staff at Reproductive Resource Center (RRC) are well-versed in both primary and secondary infertility issues. Let us put our 20+ years of success and innovation to work for you! We are here to help you achieve your dream…even if it’s the second or third time around.
-image courtesy of storyvillegirl
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I am struggling from secondary infertility. You talk about to follow your gut instinct but what happens when your doctor dismisses your instincts and is rude to you? I have had so many bad experiences that one email will not be enough. Just a thought.
Neha- Thanks for your comment. It sounds like you had a less-than-ideal experience with your healthcare provider. It’s unfortunate that your physician behaved in this manner, especially considering that this is such a sensitive, personal issue. It might not be a bad idea to seek another opinion, if at all possible. There are also counselors specializing in infertility issues and the challenges surrounding the condition that could be very helpful to you. Stay tuned–we will actually be featuring monthly guest blogging by an infertility counselor, beginning in mid-August. Best of luck to you!